When your friend is pregnant, life doesn’t just change for her, it changes for the people around her too. Suddenly you’re talking about scan dates, food cravings, and baby names instead of your usual topics, and while it’s exciting, it can also feel a bit overwhelming for her. The truth is, carrying a baby is tough. She’s probably tired most of the time, her back hurts, and she’s got a million things running through her head all at once. That’s where you come in. You can’t take on the physical side of things, but you can make her days a little easier. It doesn’t take huge gestures either. Often it’s the small things you do that she’ll appreciate most. If you’re not sure where to start, here are eight simple ways to really show up for her.
Be the one who listens
Pregnancy comes with every emotion under the sun, sometimes all in the same day. She might be excited about the baby one moment and overwhelmed with fear the next. There’s not much you can do to change those ups and downs, but what you can do is listen. Don’t feel like you have to fix everything or offer advice unless she asks. Just being someone who lets her talk about swollen ankles, endless midwife appointments, or worries about labor makes all the difference. The best kind of support often comes from the people who sit with you and say “I get it, that sounds tough” instead of trying to come up with solutions.
Show up with food
Food is a simple but powerful way to help. Your pregnant friend might be craving something random or she might just be too tired to cook. Dropping by with her favorite snack, a takeaway, or a batch of meals for her freezer can be a game changer. It doesn’t have to be fancy. Even a chocolate bar or a bag of chips can brighten her day. If you really want to go the extra mile, pay attention to what she’s been mentioning lately. If she says she’s been craving strawberries at night or wishing for a certain takeaway, surprising her with it will make her feel seen and cared for.
Help her get organized
There’s a lot to think about before a baby arrives and the endless lists can get overwhelming. Clothes, onesies, strollers, cots, car seats, and then there’s the hospital bag. Offering to sit with her and make lists or even shop together takes the edge off that stress. If she’s too tired to research, you could do the scrolling for her and find the best-reviewed items so she doesn’t have to. Sometimes just being there to narrow things down with her can make the whole process feel less daunting. She’ll remember that you took the time to help her get things sorted instead of leaving her to figure it all out alone.
Thoughtful little gestures
Pregnancy is full of advice and opinions from everyone under the sun, but what most women need more than anything is simple thoughtfulness. Remembering what she can and can’t eat, offering her a seat when you’re out, carrying her bags, or sending her a supportive message on a rough day are small things but they matter. If you’re giving her a card or a little gift, think about what you write too. Even a couple of heartfelt lines about how proud you are of her will mean the world. If you’re stuck on words, looking up baby shower card messages can help spark ideas. It’s not about writing something perfect, it’s about showing her in writing that you’re in her corner and can’t wait to meet her baby.
Offer practical help
The further along she gets, the harder it becomes to do everyday things. Carrying shopping, cleaning the house, or even just standing up for too long can feel exhausting. This is where practical help comes in. You don’t need to scrub her house top to bottom, but offering to run errands, do a quick food shop, or even fold some laundry while you chat makes a real difference. If she already has kids, looking after them for a couple of hours so she can nap will probably make you her favourite person. Practical support might not sound exciting, but it’s the kind of help that eases her load in a way she won’t forget.
Make time for normal fun
Pregnancy can sometimes take over her whole identity and make her feel like she’s just “the pregnant one.” That’s why it’s so important to keep making time for normal fun. Do the things you always enjoyed together, even if they look a little different now. Watch a silly movie, sit in a café, play a game, or go for a gentle walk. Give her space to feel like herself again, rather than just talking about due dates and baby names all the time. Those moments where she can switch off and just laugh with her friend will mean more than you probably realize.
Respect her boundaries
Pregnancy brings out the questions, the belly touches, and the unsolicited advice from everyone. Not every woman enjoys that, and it’s important to respect where she draws the line. If she doesn’t want to talk about her birth plan, don’t push. If she’s too tired for plans, don’t guilt trip her. And if she doesn’t like being touched, definitely don’t rub her belly. Ask her what she’s comfortable with and follow her lead. It’s a simple way to show her that you care about her feelings and that she’s more than just a bump to you.
Keep showing up after the baby arrives
Here’s the big one – don’t disappear once the baby comes. A lot of people are excited during the pregnancy and then vanish when things get hard. But the truth is, she’ll need you more than ever when she’s tired, emotional, and adjusting to life with a newborn. Keep checking in, even if it’s just a message. Show up with a coffee, hold the baby while she showers, or sit with her so she doesn’t feel isolated. Remind her she still matters as a person, not just as someone’s mom. The friends who keep showing up after the baby arrives are the ones who really stand out.
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